The best defense is a good offense, especially if some dude starts grinding on you. Remind any dance-floor barnacles that you can break a grown man's femur with one slick stomp. Or a bit of well-placed flailing - I'm not judging. You do you, bird. PS: Don't forget your spiked combat boots for the dace floor. Emus would love to wear them, but they lack any appendage remotely resembling arms and hands with which to tie laces. Capitalize on those thumbs, dance commander.
Tags: vexation, birb, birds, bird, cute-animals
Size matters not when you're angry enough. Like a chickadee threatening to rip out the eyes of larger-yet-lesser birds, let people know that once you get your fill of their crap you are not above wearing their innards like a neck tie.
Tags: chickadee, bird, birds, songbird, chick
Like an eldritch god made of feathers and wrathful judgement, an African Grey can show you that Hollywood divas know nothing of beauty nor destruction. Perhaps, like this bird, you can learn to truly inspire love and fear. Failing that, this parrot can at least teach you how to rip apart small furniture and probably the dog if it gets too close. PS: Please don't rip apart either the dog or any furniture. That's your grandma's quilt rack, damn it.
Tags: cute-animals, cuteness-and-vexation, vexation, cuteness, funny-saying
We all are short on something. It might as well be a shortage of care for the dramatic-yet-mundane plights of others. You can always send them a Spotify playlist of sad violins, right? I'm sure it's the same thing as sympathy.
Tags: art, birb, funny-slogan, funny-quote, funny-saying
Are you set upon by such morons that couldn't even wrap every brain cell they have around a saltine cracker? Imbeciles assail your workplace, buffoons ruin gathering of your own family, and cretins run amok in the general public. Idiocy is everywhere. Don't worry - you're not a lone island of sanity. After all, at least you can't see stupid in the dark. The Great Grey Owl doesn't have that luxury.
Tags: bird-meme, meme, great-grey-owl, vexation, cuteness