Kenny The Bartender's Tee Emporium

Description: A person in training to be an astronaut OR someone who forgets, daydreams, or is distracted from reality, needs a place to study...

Description: You're a disc jockey. You know how to spin hot stacks of wax, right? Well then you know how the tables have turned...

Description: 'Feel like you're walking on thin ice all the time? Watch out for penguins with sledgehammers...

Description: Your heart loves beer, beef, bacon and butter. Your cardiologist? 'Not so much...

Description: "When Pigs Fly" means, It'll never happen, right? Well, look up in the sky...

Description: Do you love pizza? Do you love pizza a little too much? Is there such a thing as loving pizza "too much"?

Description: Are you confused or baffled? You're not alone. Join the club with this design!

Description: There's nothing better than food cooked in a wok. It's very 'wok 'n roll'...

Description: Get your motor running and head out on the highway. If you don't have a map, play it by ear...

Description: Talk is cheap...but chicken talk is CHEEP.

Description: If it's time to quit something, get ready to put a jacket on the turkey...

Description: Your soulmate is your soul-mutt. Woof!

Description: If you like chicken and pot and pie, then this is the design for you.

Description: You and your boat rock. Especially when you dock successfully!

Description: Tone it down. Choose calm over chaos.

Description: Respect to everybody who knows how to lay a nice, straight caulk line. We salute you!

Description: You're a special pickle and the entire world should know it.

Description: Gravity is a law but you're ready for liftoff, no matter what.

Description: If someone breaks your heart, make them pay...

Description: You are what you eat, so that makes you "The Whole Enchilada"...

Description: The devil is in the details, especially when it comes to grammar and use of the apostrophe.

Description: It's always good to know what the first rule of Swear Club is, right?

Description: Life is a big juicy peach. With a really big pit...

Description: You're not the only one with anxiety. Join the club!

Description: Your dogs are your children. Don't let anybody, especially a politician, tell you otherwise...

Description: The key to a long, happy life is moderation. As long as you moderate your moderation...

Description: We're only here for a short time. Enjoy your lease!

Description: Love is like a rocket, right thru your heart.

Description: Chickens know how to turn up the volume. Plus, they're delicious!

Description: You've had some speeding tickets...but you've also had a lot of fun!

Description: Your cats are your children and don't let anyone, especially a politician, tell you otherwise...

Description: Your cat is just one UFO abduction away from being "purr-anormal"...

Description: If Santa is real then so are aliens and UFOs, right? We wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy alien invasion...

Description: Up, down and round and round. That's a rollercoaster and that's life. Hang on!

Description: You love your cat and I'm sure your cat loves you. Well, at least I'm pretty sure...

Description: Chicago sports fans have a difficult existence. It's good there's a support group...