Kenny The Bartender's Tee Emporium

Description: Your dog knows what you're up to. Your dog is very familiar with your little scam of breaking the treats in half...

Description: An expression of surprise in response to a positive occurrence, perhaps one thought to be unlikely. No way!

Description: What do you call a constipated Sherlock Holmes? Exactly...

Description: If you love Rock 'N Roll, then you know. Disco still sucks...

Description: New York is the city that never sleeps and it's filled with endless possibilities...

Description: What does a bee get after drinking beer? Buzzed...

Description: There are so many conspiracy theories to believe in, why pick just one? From Bigfoot, ghosts and aliens, to the Illuminati, Loch Ness Monster and Santa!

Description: Bigfoot can never find shoes in his size and he's very sensitive about it.

Description: Chicago is the "Second City", "The Windy City" and most importantly the "City Of Big Shoulders."

Description: Lobsters don't share. Lobsters are shellfish. Pass the butter...

Description: My doctor says I have a gambling problem. I asked if there was a cure and he said "No Dice"...

Description: It just so happens that bad bowling puns are right up my alley...

Description: You never know what you're going to dig up. You just need to know where...

Description: Look, it's a big steaming pile. No Sh!T!

Description: The voices in your head are a bad podcast and you can't unsubscribe...

Description: When something is exceedingly obvious or apparent? No duh.

Description: Why cause trouble if you don't need to? Let the sleeping demon sleep...

Description: Lack of garbage. Lack of manure. There are many reasons for a fly to be down. It's just sad...

Description: Life really is a mixtape. Just have a pencil ready, in case it unspools...

Description: Hey gardeners, don't forget to wet your plants.

Description: UFOs are here because aliens need us for their protein shakes...

Description: Everybody is fighting something very powerful. Something that's tormenting and controlling. For me, it's cheese balls...

Description: Whiskey inspires dancing around in your underwear to Bob Seger songs. Or so I have read...

Description: You can pick your friend's brain but you can't pick your friend's nose...

Description: Bacon is a universal language. It's power spans the galaxies and Martians really love it. Maybe too much...

Description: The once mighty dinosaurs are now making your engine roar. That makes your vehicle's exhaust a dinosaur fart...

Description: A bright view of the world? Sunshine on a cloudy day? The forecast calls for whiskey. Cheers!

Description: Dogs will always tell you the truth. And lick your face...

Description: I think this 'Miss Universe' contest is rigged. Every one of the contestants is from Earth. Seriously though, you're not the center of the Universe. 'Sorry...

Description: 'Got a problem? Let beer solve it. Beer fixes everything!

Description: Life is simple, thru the foamy goodness of beer. Cheers!

Description: I have a bone to pick with anyone who thinks orthopedic health is a laughing matter...

Description: A very wise bartender once said, "Life is brew-tiful when you have a cocktail in hand." Cheers!

Description: Cucumber is one vegetable that is always in a pickle. It's a dill-emma...

Description: Cats are cool and they know they're cool. Meow!

Description: In Pickleball World, a dink shot is a soft shot that falls into your opponent’s “kitchen”. That's why you should always dink responsibly...