The best defense is a good offense, especially if some dude starts grinding on you. Remind any dance-floor barnacles that you can break a grown man's femur with one slick stomp. Or a bit of well-placed flailing - I'm not judging. You do you, bird. PS: Don't forget your spiked combat boots for the dace floor. Emus would love to wear them, but they lack any appendage remotely resembling arms and hands with which to tie laces. Capitalize on those thumbs, dance commander.
Tags: vexation, birb, birds, bird, cute-animals
The Great Emu War was an unsuccessful 1932 military operation undertaken in Western Australia. Soldiers were armed with Lewis machine guns in an attempt to curb the population of the emus, but while a number of the birds were killed, the emus proved too smart and agile for the humans, and the birds emerged victorious. Emus remain plentiful in the areas outside of Perth to this day.
Tags: persistence, war-against-emus, manvsnature, nature, history