Plutonian Space Jackals Baseball T-Shirt

He was born on Pluto to a family of space jackals in a crystal oasis. But his jackal family realized all too quickly that Pluto was too cold a place to raise such an abomination. Seriously, he didn’t look like a jackal at all. They shot him off of Pluto on a space rock and wished him the best. When he crashed on Earth in the most spectacular fireworks display the human population had ever seen, he was adopted by a pair of secret agents hired by the government and the entire world swore an oath to keep his Plutonian jackal origins a secret. He’s lived a normal human life ever since.