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BlimpCo will eventually get around to being a corporate megahemoth driving industry across multiple planes of reality... until then, we're doing this.
Coming soon to a galaxy near you!
Don't Think He Knows About Helvetica, Pip T-Shirt

Description: Planning your day with Peregrin Took has never been easier. Now in convenient shirt form!

Tags: helvetica list, hobbit quote, helvetica, food lover, fellowship of the ring
Don't Think He Knows About Helvetica, Pip. T-Shirt

Description: Planning your day with Peregrin Took has never been easier. Now in convenient shirt form!

Tags: 2nd breakfast, fellowship of the ring, food, food lover, funny
The Blast Supper T-Shirt
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Description: This is my Baja, Blasted for you. Dew this in remembrance of me.

Tags: christian, christian funny, da vinci, food puns, jesus
Pour Some Helvetica On Me T-Shirt
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Description: If you've got something to say, and you know it's better to burn out than fade away, then you already know you want this. When everyone else sees it, they'll tell you "I'm a gettin it!"

Tags: metal head, rock and roll music, 80s retro, 80s bands, heavy metal
Crappy Holidays T-Shirt
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Description: Let's face it, holidays are bullshit. Everyone knows it, but is afraid to admit it... until now.

Tags: ugly xmas sweater, xmas, winter sweater, ennui, pointless
I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For Coffee T-Shirt
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Description: Who knew needing coffee was this contagious?

Tags: funny, coffee joke, silent scream, joe, covfefe meme
Do Not Comply T-Shirt
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Description: America is not a nation founded by the soft or fearful, by those who craved security over liberty. It was founded upon faith and conviction by those who chose to shrug off the yoke of oppression and live boldly. Take responsibility for your own life and your own choices. Make your own decisions, rather than meekly complying with whatever others demand of you. Do Not Comply.

Tags: liberty, i will not comply, gina carano, no mask, live boldly
Molon Christmas T-Shirt
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Description: When they tell you that you can’t celebrate Christmas with your family, there’s only one response: "Come and take it."

Tags: poinsettia, mistletoe, santa, social distancing, come and take it
Molon Turkey T-Shirt
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Description: When they tell you that you're not allowed to celebrate Thanksgiving with your family, there's only one response: "Come and take it.."

Tags: molon lave, come and take it, turkey, molon labe, holiday
Assault Kansas T-Shirt
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Description: It's common knowledge that adding "AR" makes everything more dangerous. Spread the warning far and wide about the more dangerous version of Kansas lurking in the heart of the nation.

Tags: arkansas map, gun rights, arkansas, kansas, kansas map
Human Being T-Shirt
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Description: On the days when the best you can do is just be, we got you covered.

Tags: humanity first, kindness is everything, kindness matters, kindness, humanity is free
Let's Go Brandon! T-Shirt
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Description: Who doesn't love Brandon Brown? You'll be smelling victory with this catchy chant that's sweeping the nation so quickly, you'd think it was mandatory!

Tags: biden sucks, fuck joe biden, biden, fck bdn, mandate
The Immortal Cheese T-Shirt
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Description: The love for cheese is eternal, so why not immortalize it on some swanky merch? After all, science agrees that everyone loves cheese.

Tags: food quote, cheese quote, immortality, immortal quote, funny quote
It's Tricky T-Shirt
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Description: When you've gotta rock a rhyme that's right on time, you NEED someone who's not a crook. Strap on your bowling shoes, and figure out who's going on your enemies list by their reaction to this awesome shirt!

Tags: american history, american president, gop, politics, president
Greece's Pieces T-Shirt
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Description: Olive your friends will love this shirt, and so will you. You'll want to wear it Aegean and Aegean.

Tags: puns, food pun, food parody, greek, parody
Empanadas T-Shirt
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Description: Even though you're hungry, it's still important to be specific about what you want. Let everyone know what your belly craves with this shirt rite'cheer.

Tags: food, funny, funny pun, funny saying, humor
Don't Stand So Close To Me T-Shirt
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Description: Every little thing you do will feel like magic with this mask on your face. And if you should happen to encounter another spirit in the material world, they'll remember to stay 6 feet away.

Tags: social distancing, andy summer, stuart copeland, 2020, 80s
Public Speaking 101 T-Shirt

Description: Commemorate the ultimate closer to any and all public speaking engagements. From best man speeches, to job interviews, to eulogies… even high school history reports, knock ‘em dead with this irrefutable fact: San Dimas High School Football RULES!

Tags: face the music, san dimas football rules, san dimas high school, san dimas high football rules, movie
Sub Woofer T-Shirt
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Description: Even if you're not Welsh or in the Navy, this shirt will make you the envy of all your friends and neighbors. Be the talk of the town, cause a scene on Taco Tuesday, and make those hussies at the quilting bee green with envy!

Tags: welsh, us navy, corgi, doggo, submarine
Thank You Tacos T-Shirt
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Description: Your heart may be full of love for tacos, but how full is your stomach?

Tags: taco lover, thank you meme, food, bag meme, tacos lover
Full of Waffles T-Shirt
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Description: When you can't eat your feelings, waffles are the next best thing!

Tags: breakfast, i love waffles, depression, waffles with abs, food
Full of Waffles T-Shirt
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Description: When you can't eat your feelings, waffles are the next best thing!

Tags: waffle lover, food, support, self love, self loathing
Full of Tacos T-Shirt
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Description: Isn't inner pain just the keenest (next to tacos, that is). Show your hidden demons some love by telling the world how they're a solid silver medalist... at least when compared to tacos.

Tags: anxiety, depression awareness, food, food fun, foodie
Full of Tacos T-Shirt
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Description: Isn't inner pain just the keenest (next to tacos, that is). Show your hidden demons some love by telling the world how they're a solid silver medalist... at least when compared to tacos.

Tags: anxiety, food, i love tacos, mexican food, support
Free Shrugs T-Shirt
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Description: Spread the joy of ennui wherever you go, you dapper son of a bitch!

Tags: apathy, emoji, ennui, free hugs, free shrugs
Darwin Take the Wheel T-Shirt

Description: When crappy parents let their little germ factories run wild in public, don't you just want Natural Selection to reach out and take control?

Tags: darwin fish, evolution, funny, jesus fish, jesus take the wheel
Your T-Shirt
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Description: Take your Grammar Hammer to the masses without ever saying a word

Tags: english, grammar nazi, grammar police, spelling, teacher
But Did You Die? T-Shirt
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Description: We've all been there. 12 miles, uphill, both ways, 3 feet of snow, mosquitoes the size of a St. Bernard, eggs frying on the sidewalk, haven't slept all night, haven't eaten all week... But did you die? No. No, you didn't. You sucked it up and persevered. You EARNED this shirt.

Tags: meme, perseverance, operator, perspective, suck it up buttercup
China is Asshole T-Shirt

Description: Show your support for Hong Kong protestors. From the mouth of the legend himself: https://youtu.be/8fwgVUfW_O4

Tags: add oil, hong kong protest to free hong kong, hong kong flag, hk protest, democracy
China is Asshole T-Shirt

Description: Show your support for Hong Kong protestors. From the mouth of the legend himself: https://youtu.be/8fwgVUfW_O4

Tags: hong kong pro democracy protests, hong kong protest to free hong kong, add oil, hong kong, hong kong flag
I'm a Fungi T-Shirt
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Description: "Doc, you gotta help me." the mushroom told his psychiatrist, "Nobody will talk to me at parties, and I have no friends." "I find that very hard to believe," said the psychologist. "You're a talking mushroom."

Tags: fungi, fungus, humor, joke, mycology
There's a fine line between hyphenated words T-Shirt
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Description: Nothing's truly ironic until you put it on a shirt... and then iron it. Either way, English is a weird language.

Tags: english, hyphen, grammar funny, hyphens, hyphenated non hyphenated the irony
China is Asshole T-Shirt

Description: Show your support for Hong Kong protestors. From the mouth of the legend himself: https://youtu.be/8fwgVUfW_O4

Tags: hong kong protest to free hong kong, add oil, hong kong pro democracy protests, hong kong pride, freedom
Thicc T-Shirt
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Description: You know that chicken sandwich lookin' gooooood, bro. She got a sister named waffle fries, too!

Tags: parody, chicken sandwich, humor, delicious, delicious food
The Eternal Lament T-Shirt
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Description: Just when you were about to grab a cup of hot coffee, the damn controller glitched and stole your glory. Drown your sorrow and commiserate the theft of your 100% Complete with this stylish wearable participation trophy.

Tags: arcade, retrogaming, retro, arcade game, playstation 2
Welcome T-Shirt
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Description: Class up the walking catastrophe that is your life by letting everyone know what they're in for right from the start as they bear witness to your personal tragedy. Sophisticated yet snazzy, no?

Tags: train wreck, disaster, welcome to the shit show, fml forever, catastrophe

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