Cards
Description: Our Omnipotent Dungeon Master crest is for whoever builds the world and runs the table: "Welcome to my table. The Omnipotent Dungeon Master. Roll for initiative." One of seventeen unique, humancrafted crests for your whole party. A fitting thank-you after six months of unpaid world-building. Wizard needed to add a warning: wizard: this shirt does not grant actual omnipotence. players may still ignore the plot hook, dear visitor. wizard has seen it happen. 🧙🎲 be kind to your dungeon master. they know where the dragon is.
Dungeon Master Shirt, The Omnipotent DM Tee, Roll for Initiative, Tabletop RPG Gift Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: I'm proud of this one. The Brutal Barbarian crest is for the player who solves every problem by hitting it harder: "Witness the savage fury! The Brutal Barbarian. Did you call me Savage?" It's one of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party, and PERFECT for the tank who just rolled a natural 20. Wizard asked to say a few words: wizard: do not stand between this shirt and a door, dear visitor. wizard did once. a Learning Experience, and the knee still reminds him. grumble grumble. 🧙🪓 gift it to your loudest friend. they will roar about it for weeks.
Barbarian D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Rage Fans, Melee Mains Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Fanatical Blood Hunter crest is for the player who fights monsters and pays for it personally: "Are you The Fanatical Blood Hunter. Oh, Positive." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. Dark, dramatic, and a good match for the brooding hero at your table. Before you go, wizard has a confession: wizard: wizard met a blood hunter at the inn once. polite fellow. asked wizard's blood type. wizard said "O, er, unavailable" and left through the window. grumble, sore knees. 🧙🩸 treat your monster hunter to one, dear visitor. they have had a long night.
Blood Hunter D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Monster Slayers Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: Our Talented Bard crest is for the one who turns every tavern into a concert hall: "Always play the encore. The Talented Bard. Playing all the Hits!" One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. A great fit for the face, the singer, and anyone who does the NPC voices. And wizard wanted to say: wizard: wizard has sat through this fellow's encore four times and was only asked to leave twice. oooh wizard wants it for the shelf, but wizard cannot carry a tune in a bucket. 🧙🎶 serenade someone with a gift, dear visitor. wizard will pretend not to listen.
Bard D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Musicians and Party Faces Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Pious Cleric crest is for whoever keeps the party standing after every bad fight: "Get on your knees and pray. The Pious Cleric. Holier than thou." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party, and a thoughtful thank-you for the healer who never gets one. And, as always: wizard: wizard keeps a cleric close b'cause wizard is a glass cannon and glass, it turns out, breaks. weird magic, but handy. wizard is grateful. quietly. don't tell him. 🧙🙏 thank your healer, dear visitor. they remember who didn't.
Cleric D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Healers and Support Mains Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The All Natural Druid crest is for the shapeshifter who would rather be a bear than win an argument: "Pondering the nature of violence. The All Natural Druid. You're barking up the wrong tree." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. Great for the plant parent and the woods wanderer in your group. Wizard would like to share a small story: wizard: wizard once asked a druid to turn into a bear. he turned into a mildly cross badger. wizard has not been invited back to the grove. grumble. 🧙🌿 send one to your favorite tree hugger, dear visitor. the badger approves.
Druid D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Nature Lovers and Shapeshifters Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Mighty Fighter crest is for the front liner who needs no spells, just a sharp sword and good timing: "I'm a critical hit. The Mighty Fighter. Let's wrestle!" One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party, and PERFECT for the player who holds the line. Wizard has a small confession: wizard: wizard has never won an arm wrestle with a fighter, dear visitor. wizard has tried. three times. the third was, er, more of a nap. grumble. 🧙⚔️ gift it to the one holding the line. wizard will stand behind them.
Fighter D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Front Liners, Sword Fans Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Quickdraw Gunslinger crest is for the player who brought a pistol to a sword fight: "From your cold dead hands. The Quickdraw Gunslinger. Bang bang, baby." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party, and a fun pick for the fantasy-western fan. Wizard has a few thoughts on that: wizard: wizard tried the quickdraw once, er, once. the hat got shot. wizard is fine, dear visitor, but the Chief Wizarding Officer had to buy a new hat, out of his share. 🧙🎯 gift it to your sharpshooter. wizard will stand well back.
Gunslinger D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Fantasy Western Fans Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Serene Monk crest is for the player who fights without a weapon and without raising their voice: "The Serene Monk. An open hand greets. A closed fist defeats." One of seventeen unique, humancrafted crests for your whole party. A calm pick for the martial artist at your table. Wizard asked a monk for advice once: wizard: he said nothing for an hour. wizard felt Deeply Understood. then wizard noticed the hat was gone. grumble. 🧙🥋 gift it to your calmest friend, dear visitor. they punch quietly.
Monk D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Martial Artists, Zen Gamers Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Righteous Paladin crest is for the knight who keeps every oath and smites with style: "My god can beat up your god. The Righteous Paladin. The truth hurts." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. A good gift for the moral compass of the group. Wizard heard a paladin say that to a dragon once: wizard: the dragon said "who?" and the paladin said "exactly." wizard still does not understand it, dear visitor, but wizard got a little teary. grumble. 🧙🛡️ give one to the friend who never breaks an oath, or at least tries.
Paladin D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Holy Knights, Oathkeepers Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Wilding Ranger crest is for the scout who always knows the way: "I like the nature of my work. The Wilding Ranger. Arrow arrow, what have we here?" One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. Great for the archer, the tracker, and anyone with an animal companion. Wizard followed a ranger through the woods once: wizard: he said he knew a shortcut. wizard found the shortcut, dear visitor. it was a bog. old wizard's boots still squelch. 🧙🏹 send one to your trail scout. wizard will bring the spare socks.
Ranger D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Archers and Trackers Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Irresistible Rogue crest is for the one who charms the guard and picks the pocket in the same breath: "Dashing, charming, deadly. The Irresistible Rogue. The pleasure was all mine." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. Great for the player who loves a dramatic exit. And wizard has a warning: wizard: wizard has been charmed by this fellow exactly once, dear visitor. wizard still cannot find his left boot. grumble. 🧙🗡️ gift it to the smooth talker. count your spoons after.
Rogue D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Stealth Players and Charmers Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Mystical Sorcerer crest is for the caster who never studied a day and still lights up the room: "I've got the magic in me. The Mystical Sorcerer. Lightning Bolt!" One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. A fun pick for the player who loves a wild surge. Wizard, who did study, has a complaint: wizard: wizard studied nineteen years for his spells. sorcerer fellow woke up one morning with lightning. grumble whufff. not bitter, dear visitor. mostly. 🧙🔥 gift it to your chaos caster. wizard will keep his eyebrows safe.
Sorcerer D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Wild Magic Fans Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Incorrigible Thief crest is for the one who borrows things permanently: "It's only a crime if you get caught. The Incorrigible Thief. What's yours is mine." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. A cheeky gift for the lockpick in your group. And, as always, wizard has counted the shelf: wizard: wizard counted the shelf this morning. then again. then the thief waved hello and wizard counted a third time. all present, dear visitor, but wizard is not sure about the spoons. 🧙🗡️ gift one to the sneaky friend. check your pockets after.
Thief D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Lockpickers and Sneaks Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Enigmatic Warlock crest is for the caster who made a deal and never read the fine print: "Mysterious for a reason. The Enigmatic Warlock. You don't want to know." One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. A good gift for the player with the dramatic backstory. Wizard asked a warlock a simple question once: wizard: who is your patron? the warlock said "you don't want to know." wizard said "oh good." the patron did send a surprisingly nice fruit basket tho. 🧙🌑 give one to your mystery friend, dear visitor. do not ask who the patron is.
Warlock D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Eldritch Blast Fans Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: The Learned Wizard crest is for the scholar who has a spell for everything: "The world is magical - as am I. The Learned Wizard. I wanna cast Magic Missile!" One of seventeen unique, human-crafted crests for your whole party. Great for the bookworm and the spellbook hoarder. Wizard insists he is not biased: wizard: ahem. wizard is a Fair And Impartial Shopkeeper. but this one is on the front shelf, and wizard may have cast a tiny Magic Missile at the one next to it. er, by accident. grumble. 🧙🪄 oooh wizard wants one too. gift it to the one with the biggest spellbook.
Wizard D&D Shirt, Character Class Tee, Tabletop RPG Gift for Spellcasters and Bookworms Card
$5.00 $6.00
Description: As you wish. Or, perhaps more appropriately: YOU WILL NOT BREAK ME. This mashup throws Dungeon Crawler Carl and The Princess Bride into the same gloriously ridiculous dungeon. Princess Donut takes center stage atop the Cliffs of Insanity while a succession of tiny Carl-shaped figures tumbles downward through one of the most iconic visual jokes in fantasy cinema. The typography completes the crossover, transforming the familiar Princess Bride composition into a love letter to two fandoms built on adventure, absurdity, danger, and endlessly quotable characters. Bright, weird, romantic, defiant, and immediately recognizable from across the room, this is exactly the kind of design that makes the right nerd stop mid-conversation and say, “Wait
Description: YOU WILL NOT BREAK ME. Carl, stripped down to the essentials and still somehow looking like a complete nightmare for the dungeon's management, stands beneath the crown and declaration of the Princess Donut era. The bold stained-glass treatment turns one of Dungeon Crawler Carl's most iconic attitudes into a wearable crest: Donut's pink-and-yellow glory above, Carl's infamous heart-covered boxers front and center, and one very familiar promise wrapped around the whole thing. Bright, ridiculous, defiant, and immediately recognizable to anyone who knows exactly why “YOU WILL NOT BREAK ME” hits harder than it has any right to. Perfect for a T-shirt, sticker, or the sort of merch that makes another Crawler across the room stop, point, and say
Description: THIS IS HOW I ROLL! d&d, pathfinder, dungeons and dragons, dungeons, dragons, geek, gamer, nerd, tabletop, roleplaying, rpg, wizard, magic, might, sword, d20, dice, DM, dungeon master, larp, larping, lotr, lord of the rings, orc, elf, orcs, elves, dwarf, dwarves, strahd, vampire, dice, catan, retro, gygax, unicorn, rainbow, boardgame, boardgames, roleplay, stranger things, parody, pathfinder, d6, critical hit, natural 20, crit, natty 20, nat 20, critical fail,
Description: THIS IS HOW I ROLL! d&d, pathfinder, dungeons and dragons, dungeons, dragons, geek, gamer, nerd, tabletop, roleplaying, rpg, wizard, magic, might, sword, d20, dice, DM, dungeon master, larp, larping, lotr, lord of the rings, orc, elf, orcs, elves, dwarf, dwarves, strahd, vampire, dice, catan, retro, gygax, unicorn, rainbow, boardgame, boardgames, roleplay, stranger things, parody, pathfinder, d6, critical hit, natural 20, crit, natty 20, nat 20, critical fail,
Description: THIS IS HOW I ROLL! d&d, pathfinder, dungeons and dragons, dungeons, dragons, geek, gamer, nerd, tabletop, roleplaying, rpg, wizard, magic, might, sword, d20, dice, DM, dungeon master, larp, larping, lotr, lord of the rings, orc, elf, orcs, elves, dwarf, dwarves, strahd, vampire, dice, catan, retro, gygax, unicorn, rainbow, boardgame, boardgames, roleplay, stranger things, parody, pathfinder, d6, critical hit, natural 20, crit, natty 20, nat 20, critical fail,
Description: penguin, dungeons and dragons, dice, dnd, dnd5e, D&D, roleplaying, roleplaying games, rpg, tabletop, boardgames, larp, d20, critical hit, neon, outrun, 80s, dice, nerdy gift, geek gift, chrome, retro, hipster, fantasy, orc, elf, unicorn, dwarf, magic the gathering, gorgon, stranger things
Description: dnd, pathfinder, dungeons and dragons, wizard, sorcerer, spellcaster, dungeons, dragons, geek, gamer, nerd, tabletop, roleplaying, rpg, wizard, magic, might, sword, d20, dice, DM, dungeon master, larp, larping, lotr, lord of the rings, orc, elf, orcs, elves, dwarf, dwarves, strahd, vampire, dice, catan, retro, gygax, unicorn, rainbow, boardgame, boardgames, roleplay, stranger things, parody, pathfinder, d6, critical hit, natural 20, crit, natty 20, nat 20, critical fail,
Description: dnd, pathfinder, dungeons and dragons, wizard, sorcerer, spellcaster, dungeons, dragons, geek, gamer, nerd, tabletop, roleplaying, rpg, wizard, magic, might, sword, d20, dice, DM, dungeon master, larp, larping, lotr, lord of the rings, orc, elf, orcs, elves, dwarf, dwarves, strahd, vampire, dice, catan, retro, gygax, unicorn, rainbow, boardgame, boardgames, roleplay, stranger things, parody, pathfinder, d6, critical hit, natural 20, crit, natty 20, nat 20, critical fail,
Description: dnd, pathfinder, dungeons and dragons, wizard, sorcerer, spellcaster, dungeons, dragons, geek, gamer, nerd, tabletop, roleplaying, rpg, wizard, magic, might, sword, d20, dice, DM, dungeon master, larp, larping, lotr, lord of the rings, orc, elf, orcs, elves, dwarf, dwarves, strahd, vampire, dice, catan, retro, gygax, unicorn, rainbow, boardgame, boardgames, roleplay, stranger things, parody, pathfinder, d6, critical hit, natural 20, crit, natty 20, nat 20, critical fail,
