longratprints

Description: Happy. In my lane. Focused. Flourishing.

Description: We are gay and in love and the proud mothers of a great kid!

Description: I'M SHY :(

Description: I was a traveling insurance saleswoman on the road. I had a hankering for a late-night All American breakfast and pulled into a Denny's. As I ate my pancakes, I heard a sensual voice say, "Hey girl, you can Lumberjack Slam this breakfast sausage." It was the Sasquatch, and he was hungry for more than just crispy hashbrowns.

Description: I can cast a line with the best of them but if you ask me what "gross adjusted income" means I will cry.

Description: They sit up there in the trees all day, just talking shit about us because we can't fly and live on the ground. CHIRP CHIRP THESE HANDS, ASSHOLE.

Description: I do not dream of labor. I dream of being a little jokester, just a funny man, a goofy goober.

Description: Reading is for chumps! I don't even know what this shirt says!

Description: Back the blue! And by "back" I mean "my back hurts" and by "blue" I mean "the soothing blue color of Aleve, please give me one for my back pain."

Description: Please buy this design for all your conservative dads.

Description: My husband is Megatron. He is a little crazy! But damn do I love my robot man. Better watch out, bub, because he is the possessive type! Don't try anything!

Description: My go-to when I try to show someone that I empathize with their trauma without resorting to telling them about my own trauma because I’m scared that makes me seem like a narcissist but really I’m just autistic

Description: Just a cute lil guy full of wisdom.

Description: For all the IBS baddies.

Description: Get along lil long rat. Get a lil long rat. Rat long lil get a.