Malpraxis Media

Description: "I'm not stupid, I'm just a holy fool."

Description: "I don't have talent, but I have this shirt."

Description: "If I have a nosebleed, please let me know."

Description: "I cringe when I think about what this would have said five years ago."

Description: "Better to be proud of your faults than proud not to have any."

Description: "Eternal youth."

Description: "Here I am."

Description: If I were famous, would you know?

Description: "How kafkaesque."

Description: "If this were a horror movie, you'd already be dead."

Description: "Eye-contact is sexy."

Description: "Don't let the revolution get to your head."

Description: "Abject."

Description: "Don't forget about me."

Description: "Be honest."

Description: "Are you glad all the dinosaurs are extinct?"

Description: "I'll wear this shirt even if it does have stains."

Description: "Do you hear that?"

Description: "I know what I'm talking about."

Description: "I'm not Banksy."

Description: "I know it's wrong, but I still use straws."

Description: "Foot," with a footnote that says "note."

Description: "I hope you don't find my style inauthentic."

Description: "I have like 10 more of these at home."

Description: "I hope this isn't bad timing."

Description: "Hello."

Description: "Have you ever thought about starting a podcast?"

Description: "Hero of my own story."

Description: "Everything you need to know about me is written on this shirt."

Description: "Don't talk to me, I've been canceled."

Description: "Could you repeat that?"

Description: "Actually, I just ate."

Description: "Above-average."

Description: "This is a 100-dollar shirt, but I got it for much less."

Description: "I have exceptional taste, and I'm willing to make an exception for you."

Description: "We need to talk."