Deadbolt T-Shirt
$24
Description: Finally, a shirt that says “I’m here to help… eventually.” Whether you’re dodging meetings, pushing paper, or spending 3 hours formatting a spreadsheet that no one will read, this Department of Government Efficiency tee lets the world know you’re part of a prestigious institution where nothing happens fast, but at least it happens. Sometimes. Ultra-soft cotton – because bureaucracy is exhausting and you deserve comfort Unisex fit – perfect for all departments, divisions, and vaguely defined roles Productivity not required – but sarcasm is highly encouraged Ideal for casual Fridays, budget hearings, or long lunch breaks disguised as “offsite training” Wear it proudly. Wear it ironically. Either way, it’ll be approved… after 4
Description: Like I’m a Clown? I Amuse You? Pay tribute to one of the most iconic movie moments ever with this “Funny How?” T-Shirt—perfect for Goodfellas fans, mob movie lovers, and anyone who’s ever been dangerously misinterpreted at a family dinner. Made from high-quality, wiseguy-approved cotton, this shirt is guaranteed to make people second-guess their jokes. Whether you’re the life of the party or just trying to avoid an accidental misunderstanding, this shirt lets everyone know that comedy is subjective… and sometimes, so is survival. Warning: May cause sudden outbursts of Italian hand gestures,
Description: Farewell to the Word Salads! Congratulations, America! We are finally “unburdened by what has been”—and by that, we mean Biden, Harris, and the last four years of confusion, inflation, and accidental word poetry. Inspired by Kamala Harris’s legendary ability to say a lot while saying absolutely nothing, this shirt is the perfect way to celebrate a fresh start.
