Totally Real Logos

Description: "Remember, kids! Only YOU can *unintelligible shrieking*"

Description: Just because you're fighting right-wing f*ckheads it doesn't mean you have to sacrifice being ADORABLE. UwU

Description: You don't just love boba tea, you want to BE boba tea. So we made you this boba tee. You're welcome.

Description: By request you can now tell people to step off with a darker shirt. You're welcome.

Description: For when you don't owe them a g*ddamn thing.

Description: Mood.

Description: You're no weekend warrior, you're a PROFESSIONAL warrior! Or maybe you're a warlock! Or a Paladin! Whatever your character sheet says, you're a pro all the same. Make sure everyone at the table knows it.

Description: Thousands of dungeon delvers have begun their adventures by meeting in taverns. You were probably one of those adventurers, so why not show off your roots?

Description: Thousands of dungeon delvers have begun their adventures by meeting in taverns. You were probably one of those adventurers, so why not show off your roots?

Description: Thousands of dungeon delvers have begun their adventures by meeting in taverns. You were probably one of those adventurers, so why not show off your roots?

Description: No two DMs are created equal. Show your allegiance!

Description: Our soup is better than bricks.

Description: Sometimes other cultures just had the right ideas...

Description: Are you looking for the most tasteless tacos in town? Come on down to Don's Tacos! Only the best Mexic-ish food in the tri-county area! Try our most popular combo, the Pollo Grande Meal! Mostly lettuce, a few bits of unseasoned chicken, some shreds of what we assume is cheddar cheese, and a large soda filled from top to bottom with ICE! Yummy yum! And now you can show the world how much you love Don's Tacos by wearing our new shirt!! DO IT!!

Description: Get bent, Marie.

Description: Because sometimes you need to take matters into your own mains.

Description: Sometimes a simple "no" isn't strong enough. You gotta go medieval on those fools and hit them with a full illuminated "NO."

Description: Sometimes you're a happy little bread loaf.

Description: Sometimes you like to be a little drumstick.

Description: Sometimes you're just a warm little light bulb.

Description: Sometimes you just feel like butter and jam.

Description: Sometimes you're just a little pebble.

Description: Sometimes you're a tasty little beef.

Description: Everyone knows the mark of a good metal band name logo is that you can't read it. That's what makes it cool. And the more obscure and unknown the band, the better. Therefore this is clearly the best metal band you've never heard of.

Description: It's often said that metal fans are some of the nicest people you'll ever meet. Prove them right by showing that while you may look scary, you're actually a big teddy bear.

Description: Hey, just because you love hardcore music doesn't mean you hate all things cute and fluffy. Show off your softer side while maintaining your hard, crusty outer shell!

Description: Declare your particular mental spiciness in the most illegible way possible!

Description: Just because you've got anxiety doesn't mean you don't rock hard enough to melt faces off! Embrace it! Inflict it on others with this shirt!

Description: What, you've never heard MobTher? I saw them at Open Mic Night down at that little hole-in-the-wall taco place that one time. The bassist is hot af.

Description: Mobster Thermidor's sophomore album is widely considered their best. Show those fake fans you have superior taste with this shirt featuring the art from the album cover!

Description: Are you looking for the freshest fruit in the tri-county area? Do you love all manner of scaly companions? Then come on down to ADAM & EVE'S FRUIT STAND AND REPTILE HOUSE! For a limited time we're offering a special deal: Purchase five pounds of apples and take home a baby Ball Python for FREE! That's ADAM & EVE'S FRUIT STAND AND REPTILE HOUSE, located on Four Rivers Highway five miles outside of Eden Valley! (Open Monday through Saturday)

Description: It's clearly something from Japan. Is it a beer brand? 1980's heavy industry? Anime studio? Gosh, who can say? You'd have to speak the language to know what it says, I guess. All we know is Japanese people love wearing shirts with languages they don't understand, and why should they get all the fun?

Description: Making extra cash as a delivery app driver? Why not tell everyone you work for the most obscure app of them all, Snack Mule? Slap a sticker on your car next to your Uber and Dash logos and make every other driver jealous that you deliver for someone they've never even heard of!

Description: Only the best kangaroo dogs in Western Oz! (Open Wednesdays from 12:00 to 13:00) (Cash only) (No cops)

Description: Logo for Neon Lightning Pizza Co, a completely real pizzeria, definitely not a defunct webcomic on Tapas.