Crudely Merch

When Ziggy has a bad day, he orders the triple treat box from Pizza Hut, locks himself in his room, and eats his pain.

Instead of going to college, Eve decided to save money and go to a one day Bubble Tea workshop.

Jamie lives in a van (the shoe, not the vehicle).

Zelda wears dark sunglasses so she can stare at her enemies without them knowing.

Lyla works in a tea shop where she pretends she knows everything, & every drink takes at least 15 min to prepare

Maggie has a small business called "Marital Arts" where she teaches married couples to use martial arts to solve their issues

Garrison either has a lot of freckles or chicken pox. Nobody knows for sure, but he's not telling!

RARE HIPSTER: Jane ~has a stockpile of Nestle Wonder Balls from the 90's ~is continuously filming audition tapes for Game of Thrones

Edison hates interacting with people, so he always makes sure the hot sign is off during his shift at Krispy Kreme to deter customers.

Amelia once had to call 911 because she puzzle-glued her hand to a George Washington jigsaw puzzle.

Hanna spends most of her time in the Chili's parking lot working up the courage to go inside.

RARE HIPSTER: Leah ~can be found partially straightening someone's hair at a mall kiosk ~Never shaves ~has a pet lizard

Evan is not vegan, but his feet are, which is why he wears vegan shoes.

Keith is in an indie band that plays at an arcade, but fame comes w/ a price. He must wear a costume & go by his stage name: Chuck E Cheese

RARE HIPSTER: Charley ~Only uses one form of social media: Neopets ~Refurbishes old fax machines ~Uses lip liner

Shay drinks a gallon of henna every morning because she believes it will temporarily tattoo her soul

RARE HIPSTER: Nina ~dreams of opening her own thrift shop ~buys fruit roll ups just for the tongue tattoos ~not a fan of babies

Xavier uses numerous bobby pins to secure his beanie.

Rare Hipster: Grace ~talks excessively about how much she loves college ~is the last person on Earth still invested in the Ice Age franchise

Bear plays in a band that writes songs exclusively about Taylor Swift because they feel she deserves a taste of her own medicine.

RARE HIPSTER: Gina ~wears gauchos on special occasions ~meows instead of talking ~works in a closed Rue 21

Jace is considering tattooing his whole body plaid so it looks like he is always wearing a flannel shirt.

RARE HIPSTER: Maurice ~Works at Sunglass Hut ~Keeps up with the Kardashians ~Special Skill: Refusing lotion samples from kiosks at the mall

Leo intentionally styles his hair to make it look like he just took off a beanie. Leo owns zero beanies.

Grant wears hats ironically and spends his time trying to get mistaken for a dad in the mall foodcourt.

Benton only eats foods that contain the word "waffle," such as waffle fries, waffle cones, or just plain waffles.

Naomi owns every kale themed shirt on the market.

For those who feel that the 1997 Mazda 626 was the greatest automobile of all time.

Kiesha has and etsy shop where she sells giant hand made earrings.

RARE HIPSTER: Christopher, but his friends call him "Christopher" ~fills in mustache w/mascara ~never been camping Specialty: Cappuccino art

Elaine consults a magic eight ball before making every decision.