bransonreese

Description: What if Dean Martin came back as a baby bird? Well I think it might go a *little* something like this...

Description: Mournin' Pete is a pig who runs a BBQ restaurant and wants more than anything for you to stop eating his family. But there's nothing he can do to stop you. Forces beyond his understanding compel him to serve his loved ones up to you in exchange for money he neither wants nor needs. And now he's sellin' shirts!

Description: Ever had one of those days where a coyote eats you and you die and you go to hell but when you get to hell they're like "we're full up" and so you turn back around and become alive again and escape out the coyote's mouth and also you're a rabbit? If so, this is the shirt for you! If not, this is also the shirt for you.

Description: It's pizza. The popular food made famous on the TV show "The Sopranos"

Description: This bee has a blade, you see

Description: From the meme. Remember that meme? Funny thing about that meme is it wasn't a meme originally. It was just a comic I wrote on a takeout napkin about Simpsons porn. And now it's a meme that's been dead for at least four years. But I gotta pay rent, so here I am offering it up for sale. Capitalism, man. Sucks ass.

Description: If you don't buy this, you don't love your wife. I'm sorry; I don't make the rules

Description: No specific brand loyalty here. Just, like, any old root beer.

Description: This vile cat won't stop claiming he's God. You want to strike him down.... and yet, see how your hand falters. Be careful wearing this shirt. If you're wearing it when you die, you'll go straight to hell.

Description: This happy little egg chose to voluntarily fall off the table and take this baby bird with him to hell out of spite. Every time you wear this shirt you're going to have to look into people's eyes as you explain that to them.

Description: You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. You also miss 100% of the shots you do take. You're in Hell. You were born here and you'll die here.

Description: The perfect gift for that one friend we all have who masturbates the orcas at Sea World and has a real shitty attitude about it.

Description: That lyric has always bothered me. And now the son is missing? Wow, what a fucked up day for everybody

Description: Testing the outer limits of what people are willing to spend money on

Description: This beautiful shirt reminds you never to give up on your dreams, even if your dreams are impossible and you'll never achieve them

Description: Theres two types of people in this world: people willing to buy this shirt, and people who will go to heaven when they die. Which one are you?

Description: For that common person you always run into. What a cherished gift.

Description: Everybody wants to fuck the pig. You tellin' me you don't wanna fuck the pig? Get outta here with that bullshit.

Description: This fish would like very much for you to forget about it.

Description: This deer's antlers say it has a huge dick. In the deer community, that's actually a very bad thing.

Description: this is for my sister, please don't buy it.

Description: Sometimes you just gotta