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KEEP CALM AND ASK A LIBRARIAN.
Tags: cool, design, front desk, information, keep calm and carrry on
FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT.
Tags: cringe, for her, for him, friend, humor
IDK IDC IDGAF.
Tags: bored, boyfriend, dumb, for her, for him
I LISTEN TO METAL BECAUSE FUCK YOU.
Tags: club, cool, for her, for him, friend
I WORK HARD BECAUSE MILLIONS ON WELFARE DEPEND ON ME.
Tags: cool, for her, for him, friend, husband
DON'T STOP BELIEVIN'
Tags: alien, cool, creature, cryptid, dumb
TATTOOED AND EMPLOYED.
Tags: adorable, best, classic, classy, clean
Wife. Mom. Boss.
Tags: art, cool, feminist, mama, mamma
I SURVIVED COLLEGE WITHOUT BECOMING A LIBERAL.
Tags: cool, dumb, for her, for him, friend
I'M NOT GAY BUT $20 IS $20.
Tags: 20 bucks, adorable, best, classic, classy
NO KANGAROOS IN AUSTRIA.
Tags: australian, austria, caution sign, cool, funny
I PEE IN POOLS.
Tags: adorable, classic, classy, clean, cool
MEAN PEOPLE SUCK NICE PEOPLE SWALLOW.
Tags: cool, dumb, for her, for him, humor
FEED ME TO THE LESBIANS.
Tags: cool, cover me in chocolate, design, dumb, for her for him
NO MATTER HOW GOOD SHE LOOKS SOMEONE SOMEWHERE IS TIRED OF HER SHIT
Tags: breakup, cool, design, divorce, dumb
I'M GOING TO HELL IN EVERY RELIGION.
Tags: atheism, cool, dumb, for her, for him
STRAIGHT OUTTA MY TWENTIES.
Tags: birthday, cool, family, for her, for him
YOU MAKE ME WISH I HAD MORE MIDDLE FINGERS.
Tags: boyfriend, cool, dumb, for her, for him
I NEVER DREAMED I'D GROW UP TO BE AN ASSHOLE BUT HERE I AM KILLIN' IT.
Tags: birthday, brother, cool, dad, fathers day
THIS VODKA TASTES LIKE I'LL BE TEXTING YOU LATER.
Tags: club, cool, design, drink drank drunk, dumb
I'M NO WEATHERMAN BUT YOU SHOULD EXPECT A FEW INCHES TONIGHT.
Tags: dumb, funny, humor, meme, original
You couldn't handle me even if I came with instructions.
Tags: cool, dumb, funny, humor, lol
PROUD FATHER OF A FEW DUMBASS KIDS.
Tags: dumb, fathers day, for father, funny, humor
IT'S FUNNY HOW YOU THINK I'M LISTENING.
Tags: dumb, humor, joke, lol, meme
WALK INTO THE CLUB LIKE WHADDUP I GOT A OH GOD OH NO WRONG BUILDING I'M SO SORRY CONTINUE WITH YOUR FUNERAL GOD BLESS.
DO NOT READ THE NEXT SENTENCE. YOU LITTLE REBEL. I LIKE YOU.
I'M SORRY I HURT YOUR FEELINGS WHEN I CALLED YOU STUPID. I REALLY THOUGHT YOU ALREADY KNEW.
BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER BUT MAPLE SYRUP IS THICKER THAN BLOOD SO TECHNICALLY PANCAKES ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN FAMILY.
Tags: cool, dumb, food, for her, for him
DON'T LAUGH IT'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND'S SHIRT
Tags: boyfriend, colorful, cool, dumb, for her
I have never faked a sarcasm in my life.
I'M PRETTY COOL BUT I CRY A LOT.
Tags: cool, design, dumb, for her, for him
I WOULD CUDDLE YOU SO HARD.
Tags: boyfriend, cool, cute, dating, for her
JESUS LOVES YOU! THE REST OF US THINK YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE!
SEX POLICE K-9 DOGGYSTYLE UNIT.
Tags: akita, beagle, bernese, bulldog, chihuahua
IT'S NOT A BOLD SPOT IT'S A SOLAR PANEL FOR A SEX MACHINE.
Tags: bald head, boyfriend, cool, dad, dumb
TOO DUMB FOR NEW YORK TOO UGLY FOR L.A.
Tags: cool, for her, for him, friends, humor
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