Shorts
Description: been called "unc" for being out of touch with zoomers and alphas? Lean into it! This one sports "6,7" on it too because your kids will love it if you start wearing stuff with their favorite slang on it! For sure, it will make them want to use the slang more! ; ) Also doubles as a shirt for UNC sports. But that's not the intended purpose.
Description: You been called Unc zoomers? Lean into it. I'm Unc AF. It doubles as a University of North Carolina shirt if you want it to, but that's not what it's intended to be.
Unc AF Shorts
$27
Description: Logo for the artist known as Dr. Pooper. Look super cool! It took me about 67 minutes to make this graphic look as Donald Trump as it Barack Obamas! Bad Bunny Got nothing on Dr. Pooper! Dr. Pooper gonna play the half-time show at the Toilet Bowl! It comes right after the Super Bowl! Football!
Description: This is Copter-Bob. He's a Musclecopter.... Musclecopters are like helicopters, but they have huge muscley arms, like Arnold Schwarzenegger when he was in Predator or The Terminator, or Sylvester Stallone in Demolition Man. Those movies were cool. Copter-Bob likes to take long walks on the beach, where he walks with his arms and he uses his fists as feet. He also likes to sit in nature and reflect on the nature of consciousness. He enjoys Jiu Jitsu, flying, rodeos, rock concerts, symphonies, and curling up at the hangar with a good book, fuel and a warm fire. Copter-Bob is an intellectual despite his brawny vibe. He's looking for a good time that could lead to something more serious. Hit him up! he's single and looking!
Description: Add the letter "F" to "Artist" and you get Fartist! This design is for that lady or gentleman in your life who makes farting into an art form.
Fartist Shorts
$27
Description: This is a superhero named Dissatisfied Consumer. He is a man of the people who is greeted with sarcastic warmth at every establishment he patronizes. He indulges every opportunity to let people know how they're doing. He uses a gas-powered wheel chair, not because he is disabled, but because he says, he "never feels like walking". Sometimes Dissatisfied Consumer will pre-emptively ask to see the restaurant manager, at the beginning of a meal, to prime them for the imminent barrage of insults and kvetching. He does this by introducing himself by his given name, and then announcing he is gluten-free, vegan and allergic to peanuts and soy. He warns people not to go to places he didn't like. that's his power. pretty cool, huh?
Description: This is a lil guy named Butch. He is what he is! Butch is a sweetheart! His friendly face is ready to adorn everything you own! Fall in love with Butch! Viva Butch! Donald Trump and Taylor Swift made Butch, together in a lab that doubled as a Waffle House restroom. They went in together to squash beef. They failed at squashing beef, but they managed to create this guy somehow. I'm not sure how, because only Donald Trump and Taylor Swift were there to witness Butch be born. He's a cute lil guy. Obviously, I'm lying about his origins, but it makes for a sweet story.
Butch Shorts
$27
Description: My face when someone asks me why I am where I am. I am stricken by the impulse to analyze the question. I regress into the depths of my mind and forget where I am and why I am there. I become a statue of a tomato. I become an immovable object. I become what Taylor Swift would consider to be an idiot. Donald Trump would call me stupid. Shane Gillis would call me a dork. I'm just trying to up my SEO with these references. I think anyone would consider me an idiot.
Description: This is Clod. He's a dirtball! He is so cool and he loves to give hugs. Very fashionable during every season! He makes a great buddy!
Clod Shorts
$27
Bok Boys! Shorts
$27
