Grip Grand

Description: Perfect for babies, grandparents, and other piss freaks. For fans of self-urination.

Description: You know the song from Eraserhead. Man, that weird baby really freaks me out. Eraserhead is a movie by David Lynch. If you buy the shirt version of this thing, it basically says so on the back.

Description: It’s a letter board at a diner that says “now serving” followed by the words “sorry, we are out of cunt…meatloaf still available.” I think it’s pretty self explanatory. For fans of serving cunt, not serving cunt, diners, and meatloaf. Also, good old fashioned hospitality.

Description: Infected by the croak mind virus! It’s like the woke mind virus, but for frogs! And I love frogs

Description: We all love a rebus! The solution here is simple: I Love Hen Tie. Or is that hentai? Whether you love sexy anime and manga or neckware for ground fowl, this riddle of a shirt is for you

Description: Vintage pulp crime fiction illustration of a black domino face mask and a small black handgun, on a red paper field with the book price of 25 cents pictured

Description: Vintage mid century pulp science fiction illustration of an astronaut on fire in space and you can kind of see his bones

Description: Iconic movie, iconic vintage flier, you should watch Paris is burning if you haven’t, top ten documentary

Description: 1920’s Art Deco rendering of a woman’s long and shapely legs

Description: A photograph I took of a famous photograph but then I did stuff to it

Description: A woman throwing her hands over her head with pleasure, retro old magazine erotica look

Description: Vintage mid-century style illustration of a colorful, feathery sea anemone

Description: Diablo Records released underground Spanish-language adult comedy LPs in the 1960s-70s. Their logo is exttemely sick. For fans of music, vinyl, and the devil. Un disco marca Diablo!

Description: Brian De Palma’s Phantom of the Paradise features a Faustian bargain between a tortured young musician and, spoiler alert for Faustian bargains, the Devil. The devil runs a record company. The name of that company is Death Records.

Description: A tribute to brutalist architecture and also life being hard. Celebrate brutalism and existential misery at the same time with this picture of a building.

Description: Bad Medicine for Dr. Drugs! It’s a mission statement plus a little picture of a syringe! I don’t get it either!

Description: Remember those ads that said ‘you wouldn’t download a car’ or whatever? Ah, nostalgia. This is like that but about sexy sex organs. Namely, penis.

Description: It’s a man holding a bunch of money. He is a capitalist. This is an anticapitalist shirt. Money men ruined the world. Don’t let the, seduce you with their fake economics. They only know greed.

Description: ‘There Is No Ethical Consumption Under Capitalism’ original digital illustration by Grip Grand. Your favorite fast food friends cannibalize each other in the name of profit. Educational fun for you and your anti-capitalist pals

Description: This is a picture of two pocket knives! You shouldn’t call them knifes, it’s incorrect. But now your shirt can! For fans of sharp objects and cutting implements.

Description: Men dancing! Men fighting! Wrestling is one of the most homoerotic activities broadly accepted by straight society, apropos of nothing. This is a couple of men, having a tussle.

Description: Two men are holding each other. Are they fighting or dancing? They are. BOYDANCE. Maybe they are in a band. Two guys. Two gentlemen. Kinda looks like a dance to me idk btw does anyone even read these? I hope not.

Description: A picture of two old cars, going fast! High speed! Also it says the word amphetamine. This is an UPPER tier shirt, if you know what I mean. I don’t, I was always terrible at chemistry. Don’t do drugs!

Description: A skull that is also a lightbulb. A skull bulb. Light bulbs signify ideas! Skulls signify death. Death of the idea. Hell is in the mind.

Description: A kitten in the classic retro ‘hang in their’ dangling pose with the words ‘God gives his toughest battles to me personally.’

Description: What if a horse could talk? Would the horse thank you for riding it and making it pull your stagecoach? Idk my friend. In this case, the man is joking around, he says ‘why the long face’ and the horse isn’t having it. Things turn dark real quick. Horse humor. Don’t say neigh!

Description: Oops I seem to have gotten my iconic 90’s television programs mixed up. Which is the one bout solving mysteries? Twin Files? X-Peaks? Either way, it’s not that clever. The tshirt version has a joke on the back. It’s a cheeky gag about human breasts and the artsy tv show.

Description: Rep your love of doomed Greek philosophers with this Socrates ‘Hemlock Gang’ design by Grip Grand. Who among us has not wanted to drink poison at some point? We must imagine Socrates happy. I’m mixing my philosophical schools here, but you get the point. If you love philosophy and/or hate life, this is the one for you.

Description: ‘You Do You’ original artwork by Grip Grand, digital illustration on found vintage cigarette advertisement, 2020. A suave monster man smokes Facts brand cigarettes and exhorts you to be realistic like he is, meanwhile he has an acid tab on his tongue and a tiny guy screaming on his shoulder. Facts cigarette ad parody, defaced with love.

Description: ‘Wild Night at the Symphony’ original artwork by Grip Grand, digital illustration on found advertisement. Monster girl experiences cigarettes, chocolate bars, lobster claws, and some kind of stuffed animal

Description: ‘Sip Some’ original artwork by Grip Grand, digital illustration on found vintage liquor advertisement. Featuring a pair of colorful monsters drinking southern comfort-type liquor surrounded by blood, gold chains, a sentient slug saying ‘only death loves you’ and so forth

Description: ‘New Box’ original digital illustration on found Newport cigarette ad by Grip Grand, 2020. Monsters eat sausages, shrimp, and worms, with pleasure! Vintage Newport cigarette ad defaced in good fun

Description: “Skull Face” original artwork by Grip Grand, pen and ink on paper, 2020. A skull covered in hand-drawn cartoon faces, including classic characters from your favorite comic books, comic strips, and cartoons. Includes hidden ACAB

Description: I Continue To Be A Sad Eyed Little Tramp Despite The Odds, original design by Grip Grand. Weird Margaret Keane ish Hallmark card parody. Sad boy in party hat with party favor and tall socks looks depressed but perseveres

Description: ‘Blurst’ original artwork by Grip Grand, digital illustration on found advertisement, 2020. Alien woman and monster octopus cavort in the beautiful interior of a vintage muscle car, as seen in a found advertisement from the 1960’s. Monster girl puts on make up next to her octopus friend

Description: ‘Animal Lecture’ original artwork by Grip Grand, digital illustration on found photo featuring colorful monster students attending a lecture