Deadpan Phone Cases - iPhone and Android

Simple white letters on black background: "I have just had tea or am on my way to get tea." Maybe you're British; maybe you're an Aussie grandpa about to put the kettle on and get out the biscuit tin. But it's time for a cuppa tea.

Simple white letters on black background: "Going through a stage." No one has to know how long this particular stage is. A whole lifetime can be a stage, right?! You do you. Introvert, extrovert, ambivert, or just "Ehhh, people."

Simple white letters on black background: "Going through a stage." No one has to know how long this particular stage is. A whole lifetime can be a stage, right?! You do you. Introvert, extrovert, ambivert, or just "Ehhh, people."

Simple white letters on black background: "I'D RATHER BE AT BRUNCH". Well, who wouldn't?! Chicken and waffles. Bottomless mimosas. Eggs benedict or pancakes or French toast or bacon or - well. You get the picture. Brunch is life.

Simple white letters on black background: "I have just eaten bacon or am on my way to get bacon." Life is a never-ending parade of bacon and some of us like it like that. Tasty salted pig parts; nom nom.

Simple white letters on black background: "I would have replied but I didn't want to." Yeah. Sometimes you just gotta leave people on read. Because replying is just too much effort.

The King of the Silents.

This is My Second Rodeo

Flames and fire and the words "this is fine" are perfect for these strange apocalypse days - for a coffee cup in your burning kitchen, or something else. Variations on this design available, also in white.

"If you wanna be a cowgirl, you're gonna need a horse" in pink and orange western or saloon style letters. Cowgirls everywhere have to get themselves kitted out, so grab your boots and your hat and your lasso and your horse.

Simple white letters on black background: "I'D RATHER BE AT BRUNCH". Well, who wouldn't?! Chicken and waffles. Bottomless mimosas. Eggs benedict or pancakes or French toast or bacon or - well. You get the picture. Brunch is life.

Simple white letters on black background: "A year of lockdown has not improved my social skills." Have you been talking only to the cat? Been cutting your own hair? Forgotten how to smile? Yeah, join the post-pandemic club.

Simple white letters on black background: "I have just eaten tacos or am on my way to get tacos." Are they hipster or are they simply classic? Doesn't matter; tacos are just the best. Well, all Tex Mex is pretty aces; that's just facts.

Simple white letters on black background: "Donuts are my favorite circles." I mean, there's not even really any competition. Maybe LPs. Or in very specific circumstances - a life ring. But otherwise - sweet snacks all day, baby!

Simple white letters on black background: "Nuance? Never heard of it." Maybe there's no room for grey/gray in your worldview - everything's black or white, good or bad, up or down, awesome or terrible. This is for you.

Simple white letters on black background: "Donuts are my favorite circles." I mean, there's not even really any competition. Maybe LPs. Or in very specific circumstances - a life ring. But otherwise - sweet snacks all day, baby!

Simple white letters on black background: "A year of lockdown has not improved my social skills." Have you been talking only to the cat? Been cutting your own hair? Forgotten how to smile? Yeah, join the post-pandemic club.

Simple white letters on black background: "You can think about some shush." So cheeky. You can think about some shush. ZIP IT.

Another great illustration from the renowned artist Paul Cemmick's Crazy Quotes Collection

Spoilt Victorian Child

Simple white letters on black background: "coulda woulda shoulda". Ehhhhh *shrug* maybe there are some things you coulda done differently, but no regrets, hey? Unless you decided not to get vaxxed. Regret that, and then rectify it while you can.

It's a T-shirt with T-Shirt written on it that you can wear on a T-Shirt. You know, because... reasons...

Simple white letters on black background: "FOGO: Fear of going out." Ehh, going out was always over-rated and now, with a pandemic, and fascists, and Karens everywhere - just stay home. Couch good.

Simple white letters on black background: "Fashion sense: Didn't think I'd see anyone I know." For the stylistically challenged and loud-trouser-wearing folks among us.

Simple white letters on black background: "cautionary tale". Wear it as a warning to others - or maybe a badge of honor. Learn what not to do by observing a genuine black sheep!

Simple white letters on black background: "Ms. Stacey Abrams stan account." She's a force to be reckoned with, and Stacey Abrams is just getting started. We stan.

Simple white letters on black background: "Gen X sais pas." Gen X - the forgotten generation. Everyone's all up on the Boomers and the Millennials but we exist, dammit! Not that anyone indicates they know that.

Simple white letters on black background: "Dark Robinette cancels malarkey". Sure, you can cheer for Dark Brandon or chant let's go, but in the end Dark Brandon is gettin' things done. Not even joking.

Simple white letters on black background: "My opinions change with new information." There's this ancient practice, largely forgotten in modern times, of learning new facts and then... adjusting one's stance. It's ground-breaking.

Simple white letters on black background: "Up here for thinkin'. Down there for dancin'." Up here for thinkin' (point to head). Down there for dancin' (point to feet). Thanks Uncle Jack for the best sayings :)

Simple white letters on black background: "IDK what's going on but it's a LOT." Look, no one can blame you. It IS a lot. If you're feeling overwhelmed, you're not alone. Hopefully we'll get to the good part soon?

Simple white letters on black background: "Winging it." Do I look like I know what I'm doing? That's cool. Truth is, I'm making it up as I go. Possibly you are too.

Simple white letters on black background: "inspirational quote". Ehhhh, can't be bothered. Fill in your own inspirational quote. This design is like the blank card in Cards Against Humanity - choose your own snark.

Simple white letters on black background: "Actions speak louder than words. Yes, I'm aware of the irony." Sorta speaks for itself, right. Doesn't mean you're not taking action AS WELL, of course.

Sarcastic, This is my second rodeo white

Simple white letters on black background: "My opinions change with new information." There's this ancient practice, largely forgotten in modern times, of learning new facts and then... adjusting one's stance. It's ground-breaking.