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K. Thor Jensen is a cartoonist and Bad Person living on a small island.
Friday Harbor, WA

Magnets

Drug Enforcement Administration Ecstasy & Club Drugs Patch Magnet
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Description: Now you too can wear the Grim Reaper tripping balls on molly

Tags: club, club drugs, dance music, dea, drug enforcement administration
Boppin With The Boys Magnet
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Description: Based on a T-shirt worn by Dave "The Cobra" Parker in 1976 to get the Pirates out of a losing streak.

Tags: pittsburgh, pirates, the cobra, athletic, baseball
Survival Tobita Magnet
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Description: I was horrified to find that not only was the original Survival Tobita shirt unavailable anywhere on the Internet, but the only record of it was a low-res JPG. Using AI upscaling, font matching and elbow grease, you can now proclaim your fandom of the Japanese Rock 'N Roller in the 2K22

Tags: japan, japanese, ken the box, monsters, pro wrestling
World Association of Ugly People Magnet
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Description: Meeting every year in Piobicco, the Club dei Brutti celebrates ugliness in all its forms.

Tags: ugliness, festival of the ugly, appearance, piobicco, club dei brutti
UFO Sightings Chart Magnet
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Description: I found this seriously awesome 1960s chart of UFO sightings in the National Archives and decided to make a shirt out of it.

Tags: sci fi, flying saucers, science fiction, 1960s, archives
I Hate Snakes Magnet
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Description: Why shouldn't we step on snakes? Snakes suck.

Tags: meme, gadsden flag, patriot, dont tread on me, gadsden
Percland Signature Magnet

Description: Show your dedication to getting zooted in bulk with this excellent shirt

Tags: 1 hot dog, parody, percs, perkies, savings
In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida The Long Version Magnet
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Description: As sported by Billy "Boogie" Worrell in the "Ernest's Family Album" VHS. Cut the sleeves off after purchasing for best results.

Tags: classic rock, ernest p worrell, jim varney, nostalgia, retro
Skeleton Warriors With Big Titties Magnet
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Description: Your adventuring party opens the thick wooden door. They enter a damp stone room with exits to the EAST and SOUTH. Facing the party is a group of four SKELETON WARRIORS with BIG TITTIES. Roll for initiative.

Tags: breasts, boobs, hooters, tits, bubs
Brain Groin Kickin Magnet
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Description: As seen on a bar sign in Kyoto

Tags: alcohol, bar, brain, groin, japan
The Only Good Fascist Is A Dead Fascist Magnet
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Description: Now more than ever

Tags: antifascism, fascism, political, politics, resist
Short Dick, Long Balls Magnet
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Description: Do you got a Short Dick and Long Balls? Let the world know about it.

Tags: testicles, gonads, naughty, balls, penis
Big Bucks Magnet
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Description: It's the square you want to land on when you play Press Your Luck, unless you are a sick freak who loves whammies

Tags: niche interests, cash, whammies, money, game shows
Death Metal Wine Mom Magnet
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Description: Do you know a Wine Mom who also bangs her head to Morbid Angel? Get her this shirt.

Tags: metal, logo, death metal, thrash, music
Violence Heart Magnet
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Description: Express the true love of your wild violent heart

Tags: love, heart, graphic, icon
Only Trust Your Fists Magnet
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Description: Police Will Never Help You

Tags: typography, streets of rage, prison abolition, pixel art, sega
DEHUMANIZE YOURSELF AND FACE TO BLOODSHED Magnet
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Description: You stand on the city of disaster. the Beast City, where the Biological Intelligence in Artificial System, what we call "BIAS" locates. Nobody knows about what has been going on "BIAS", You could hear nothing but deep breathing of "BIAS". The only way to survive is...

Tags: dos, post apocalyptic, gaming, retro, games
Dumplings Magnet
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Description: Some dumplings of various types

Tags: gyoza, shumai, bao, food, dumplings
Herb's Tavern Magnet
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Description: The oldest watering hole on San Juan Island, Herb's was founded in 1943 and hosted many locals getting sauced until it burned to the ground due to arson in 2022. They had a shirt with boobs on it, and this is that shirt.

Tags: bar, boobs, breasts, drinking, friday harbor
This Isn't A Bald Spot Magnet
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Description: A Classic Joke T-Shirt! Make The Family Laugh and Laugh Laugh!

Tags: bald spot, boardwalk, hobo font, novelty, joke
Major Depressive Disorder Magnet
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Description: Show the world you're down (to party) (alone)

Tags: anxiety, brain, clinical trial, depressive, mental health
Live To Post Post To Live Magnet
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Description: Nothing will detain the Poster from his God-given duty: to Post

Tags: skeleton, social media, skull, online, extremely online
No Diarrhea Today Magnet
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Description: If you wake up in the morning and you're worried you might have diarrhea, just wear this shirt.

Tags: magic, warding, bathroom, poop, incontinence
I Survived A Global Pandemic Magnet
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Description: It doesn't seem fair.

Tags: pessimism, disease, bummer, novelty, pandemic
Abolish Football Magnet
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Description: It will take a significant amount of guts to wear this shirt in certain parts of this country.

Tags: america, brain damage, medical, varsity, sports
Terry Funk Magnet
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Description: RIP to a real one

Tags: black flag, funk, parody, punk, tribute
The Cat Be Unemployed Magnet
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Description: If there's a better name for a brand of extremely toxic rat poison I don't want to know what it is

Tags: advertisement, animal, chinese, cool name, poison
Aura Farm & Wilderness Magnet
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Description: Build resilience, independence and aura in the woods of Vermont

Tags: aura farmer, aura farming, f w, farm, farm and wilderness
Watch Out For Flying Cats Magnet
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Description: Japan has dangers unknown to us

Tags: attack, cat, diamond, japan, japanese
Big Barry's Magnet
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Description: The pride of Long Island, with burgers and steak by the ounce

Tags: big hat, chain, cowboy, long island, new york
Truck Dick Magnet
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Description: Forget Big Johnson shirts. Forget Coed Naked shirts. Forget And 1 shirts. It's the 2018s... and it is time for Truck Dick.

Tags: manly, testosterone, mascot, manhood
Old Bitch Magnet
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Description: Sure, they make ketchup chips, but sometimes you just need to tell the world you're an old bitch.

Tags: windmill, parody, dutch, old, profanity
Pissing & Shitting & Cumming & Dying Magnet

Description: Pay tribute to your essential bodily functions with this graphic T-shirt

Tags: graphic, helvetica, tribute, homage, experimental jetset
Free 100 Levels Magnet

Description: This advertisement tantalized many young readers of comic books in the late 1980s. Don't send ten dollars to that address, Star Games is gone. Buy the shirt instead.

Tags: old comics, tabletop roleplaying, rpgs, ads, supplements
Every Person Who Has Ever Lived Magnet
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Description: It's an undisputable truth and one that should be remembered.

Tags: garbage, history, shit, cancel culture
Major Depression Magnet
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Description: Express your diagnosis with WordArt

Tags: brain, clinical trial, depressed, mental health, mental illness

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