Deadpan Hoodies

Simple white letters on black background: "geriatric millennial". Look, don't bristle at it; embrace it. There's nothing wrong with growing old and with all the damage those boomers are doing, you might be the last generation that gets to.

"You're terrible Muriel" (colors) - whether you're a jealous sister gloating over someone getting in trouble, or just want to remember an iconic 90s line, this could be for you. Available in other colors and styles.

A stylish and modern typography design, with the words "This is my second rodeo" written in bold, white letters. The font is playful and eye-catching, adding a touch of humor and creativity. The design is centered on a clean, white background, making the text stand out and creating a fresh, modern vibe., typography

Simple white text on black background: "K." Some generations know how devastating a reply this is to receive; others are oblivious. But we're done here. K.

Simple white letters on black background: "I was told there would be a handbasket." Look, it's one thing to deal with plague and fascism and end times. But it was pretty much a promise that when we were going to hell, it would be in a handbasket. Come on, now.

Simple white letters on black background: "Born canceled." Keep expectations low and people won't expect much from you. Then you can do what you want. Genius.

Simple white letters on black background: Noice. Put on your best Aussie accent and drag out the vowels a little to show your approval: noiiiiiiice. It's excellent.

Simple white letters on black background: *aggressively drinks tea* Because sometimes there are no words and your teacup has to do the talking.

Simple white letters on black background: "Hab' kein Bock." German for "I don't want to". Whatever it is - I don't want to. And I don't have to. Was immer es auch is - das will ich nicht. Und das brauch ich nicht.

Simple white letters on black background: "I don't care." Want fries with that? What's in Area 51? How much chocolate is too much? Does pineapple belong on pizza? I don't care. I can't even.

Simple white letters on black background: "Please wake for meals and snacks." You can limit this to a sticker or a mask on the plane, OR you can wear it every day. Just in case you fall asleep somewhere; you don't want to miss a meal or snack, do you?!

Simple white letters on black background: "Legend in my own lunchbox." Because I'm just amazing. It's just that no one knows. But one day, they will.

Simple white letters on black background: "More tater tots, please." Try to think of ONE THING that tater tots wouldn't improve. See, told you.

Simple white letters on black background: "I was promised taco trucks. On every corner." Was there ever any 'threat' that backfired more than this one? Tacos? YES PLEASE. The answer to 'tacos' is ALWAYS YES.

Simple white letters on black background: "I can't even." When you can't even, you can't even express it. Let people know. It's the "well I never" of modern times.

Simple white letters on black background: "What, no interrobang?!" See, it's funny because it relies on niche knowledge of obscure punctuation. OK, maybe that's in the eye of the beholder.

Simple white letters on black background: "mad scientist". Do you have a tower or a lair? Do you frequent graveyards? Perhaps this design is for you.

Simple white letters on black background: "geezer". There's nothing like British slang and if you're a geezer there ain't nuffink you can do about it, orright?! London East Ender or general bloke - this could be for you.

Simple white letters on black background: "Very busy & immensely important." Things to do, people to see, tacos to eat, couches to lie on. I might even do some doomscrolling later on.

Simple white letters on black background: "It's all a bit much." There's a pandemic and there's an ongoing climate crisis and democracy is in danger and - well - it's all a bit much, innit? Understatement, yay.

Simple white letters on black background: "Nope." Because sometimes, no matter what the question is, the answer is NO.

Simple white letters on black background: "permanently overwhelmed". And face it, who isn't? The pandemic was just the icing on a sh***y cake of climate change, rising fascism, and all the rest of it. Keep going.

Simple white letters on black background: "What now?!" Are you just waiting for the next crisis? A pandemic, an insurrection, a polar vortex, a zombie invasion? This is for you. With feeling.

Simple white letters on black background: "miscreant". Just make sure your rebellion is against evil. If it's against good people or just self-serving, you end up kinda a d*ck, y'know?

Simple white letters on black background: "Not a team player." Teams are overrated, and team-building activities are purgatory. Introverts and the generally anti social unite.

Simple white letters on black background: "Aight". I'm agreeing with everything you say. Or about to head out. Maybe both.